Saturday, June 27, 2009

My Saturday

It's Saturday again. Wake up at 12 noon, having lunch, listening to songs, watching movie and taking a nap. These were what I have been doing in these 7.5 hours. Feel not happy over the things I have done until now. No satisfaction and sense of achievement. There should be some meaningful things that I want to do, but I don't know what is it. Afraid of getting old without doing anything.
Posted by アラン様 at 7:28 PM 1 comments

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Still In "Down" Period

Still haven't recover from "Down" period although it have been more than half a year. Have no idea when and how it get started. Having negative thoughts most of the time. Feeling lost. All the things that supposed to be done were not done. Can't get myself motivated to do anything. How long I have to be in this state? How am I able to get myself out of this? How come I feel no more fun in this world? Feel like there's nothing that can make me interested and excited anymore. There's nothing remain other than the empty shell of a shape of human, a breathing empty shell. Sometimes, I really afraid to wake up from sleep. When I'm awake, all those negative thoughts come haunting me again.

Going to have my final exam for this semester on 19th and 20th May. But I'm still wavering around. I have no idea about what I have done all these time. Supposedly, I should be studying by now. But somehow I'm here writing nonsenses in my blog, which I had neglected for a long period. Really hope somehow I'm able to get myself motivated to study.
Posted by アラン様 at 8:04 PM 3 comments

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Eternal Pose By Asia Engineer

This song is very meaningful. Attached below are the translation of the song.



The pieces of a half-grasped dream are unchanging things
Us who are chasing after our aspirations float in the sky
Even during times when we were exhausted, it's something unchanging
Will we always be able to hold the compass to search for them, I wonder?

A tiny memory, I quietly opened my notebook
A notebook that bound up old past actions
Even now it's a precious treasure that's in the very back of my drawer
As the plots of the dreams that come to me when I fall asleep
Change little by little, I realize that I'm growing up
How to make my dream come true
I'm blue because there's no way to know that
Hard times unfold, and the tears come, but I still have my dreaming heart
Pieces of a dream scattered like stardust
Their light has already disappeared now
But somewhere deep within all of our hearts, it's still, and always will be a precious treasure

An empty childhood dream, following the unforgettable thread of a memory
So that the flame that still burns in my heart won't go out
Entrusting my thoughts to the familiar clear sky, together with my friends
Across the changing times for eternity, for eternity...

I wonder if I can say that it's fate?
We all met each other because we had the same thing
We talked through the night, laughed, played; We found the first star on that night
Those kind of memories are bound up in a new notebook
With the way and direction to get the next page
Now we've hoisted a sail, and finally have taken off together down the route, go!
We went through so many seasons together
We'd been chasing the same dream for a long time
When we turned around, it was lying right behind us
We've changed that past a little bit
Now we're just letting the wind take us, and going wherever our thoughts take us
You understand "I'll never give up" without me having to say it
So let my voice reach you!

An empty childhood dream, following the unforgettable thread of a memory
So that the flame that still burns in my heart won't go out
Entrusting my thoughts to the familiar clear sky, together with my friends
Across the changing times for eternity, for eternity...

They say that it's not cool to have dreams nowadays
Time passes so quickly, that there's no time to look back
But I'm sure of the thoughts that I imagined back then, something that makes my heart dance
I don't care what anyone says, we're going to pass through this road
The cue is always something small, so what is it that's different? My heartbeat
The things that have changed are the circumstances and the sound of the wind
Something unchanging will always be there...
Someday I'll arrive at the end of my dream, I want to grow up like this as much as I can
In this endless sky that I look up to, for eternity, for eternity...

The pieces of a half-grasped dream are unchanging things
Us who are chasing after our aspirations float in the sky
Even during times when we were exhausted, it's something unchanging
Will we always be able to hold the compass to search for them, I wonder?

I want to smile forever...
Posted by アラン様 at 3:19 PM 0 comments
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Friday, January 9, 2009

9th Jan 2009

Finally, final exams are over for me. For some of the students, probably their last paper will be on 11th Jan. Somehow, this time I didn’t feel excited about the 3 weeks holiday. For the previous holidays, I would always imagine what to do during the holiday and feel excited about it before the holiday is around the corner. But I don’t feel that way this time. Probably this is because of all the unhappy stuffs happened on me and also the people around me.

One of the unhappy stuffs is related to E107B. All the housemates except Nath are going to move. I’m also the one of them. At first, I never thought of this to happen. One of the reasons is that the owner of the house is going to increase the rental from RM1500 to RM1800. The moment the housemates decided to move out, somehow I feel unhappy. I never thought that the moment we stay together will end so soon. Even though, we have been staying together for almost a year, I feel that we have just staying together for a couple of months. Today, I will be finishing up the packing all my stuff. The next time I come to E107B will be just taking all my stuff after my new accommodation is confirmed. Nath faced quite a serious problem. 7 of his future housemates pulled out from E107B at the last minute, the moment the agreement is almost to be signed.(Hope Nath will solve this problem ASAP.)

I have been wondering. All those unhappy stuffs, are they related to my problematic personality? I have caused the people around me to worry about me. Here, I would like to thank them for concerning about me and sorry for worrying about me. At the last, I was the one who make others worry. Will it be fine for me to stay with my new housemate? I’m just afraid I might bring more problems to them. Sad Christmas, sad Awal Murharram and sad New Year. Soon it will be Chinese New Year and my 22nd birthday, will it will be still a sad one? Hope all those unhappy stuffs will be gone in a short time.
Posted by アラン様 at 10:57 AM 2 comments

Monday, December 15, 2008

Being Tagged??

Why am I being tagged leh? I wonder why.
Haiz... Never mind la. I'm going to write it now.
Actually, before being tagged, I was hoping that no one will tag me.
But who knows, one after another. First, Zhou Zhou then followed by Loong Loong. (Hey, I'm not blaming both of you ar. Haha.)
So let's get started now.

According to the rules, after being tagged, you have to do this all thing:

  • List this rules on your blog
  • Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog.
  • Tell 7 unspectacular quirks on yours.
  • Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their name as well as links to their blog.
  • Link the person who tagged u.
  • Leave a comment for each blogger.

7 FACTS about アラン様

  1. Born on 2nd February 1987.
  2. My full name is Alan Chen Meng Keong.(But, people who doesn't know me called me by Alan Chen Meng, makes me feel so weird.)
  3. アラン is my Japanese name.
  4. Eldest among the ATM.
  5. Gaming all the time.
  6. Love animals. But my mum doesn't allow me to rear a dog.(Only allow to rear tortoise.)
  7. The country I want to visit the most is Japan

7 UNSPECTACULAR QUIRKS

  1. A cry baby when I'm still very very small. Cry all the time. My mum says that she really "beh tahan" me.
  2. Prefer to bite my nails instead of cutting them off using nail cutter.
  3. Always give comment to the dishes cooked by my mum.
  4. Prefer to stay long inside bathroom when taking bath.
  5. Always delay my work.
  6. Last minute guy.(Even when studying for final exams.)
  7. Zero social skill.

7 PEOPLE TAGGED BY アラン様

Huh... Finally done. Hehe.

Posted by アラン様 at 9:23 PM 3 comments
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